Monday, April 4, 2011

Quick Note

Every Friday night around 7:00 this red Dodge Charger pulls up in front of my neighbor’s garage. The man inside is probably in his late 40s. He lays on the horn for a solid 10 count and within a few moments this pretty little blonde, probably late 30s, comes bobbing down the stairs and gets into his car. He peals out when he takes off and I usually don’t see the car again until Saturday morning.

Ok, I know I can’t be the only “old-fashioned” person who thinks this is ridiculous. If Joe and I didn’t live together and he ever pulled up and blared his horn for me to come outside I would probably throw something at his truck. Probably more than one something.  Get the hell out of the car and go to the damn door like a motherfucking gentleman.

Maybe I have just been out of the dating world for too long but I expect doors to be opened for me and chairs to be pulled out; heavy things are carried and bathtub drains cleaned out even though it’s my hair because it’s just gross. He leads when we dance and puts his hand on the small of my back to guide me across a crowded room. I don’t have to ask him to do these things, he just does. He likes taking care of me.

Am I crazy? Is chivalry really dead?


I'm Susan Szold. said...

You are so CUTE!!!!!! Yes, girl, it's damn well dead and if Big Dinosaur does those things make him cupcakes every day.

Actually, I was over-reacting. It's not entirely dead. There are some gentleman out there. I am married to one althogh the "small of the back" thing stopped a long time ago. I've tried to teach the rules to my boys and who are quite chivalrous when I'm watching....who knows what louts they become when I'm not.

Wear a fake mustache (I will send you one if you can't find any) and scream " Hey, Annabelle,get out of the fucking car and ring the doorbell like a human being!!!" at the top of your lungs next time that guy pulls up.

CatZilla said...

Why have I not thought of that?? Or possibly I should just throw things at his car? I have a prtty good arm...I bet I could hit it...

Shanna said...

Maybe it is her dad...or brother...and in case he hasn't told you,Big Dinosaur is scared of you! I will bring you a mustache tomorrow to try out this Friday (like that idea). Just in case, make sure you have your bedazzled shot gun loaded!

CatZilla said...

SHANNA!!! My bedazzled shotgun was supposed to be a surprise!!! Way to ruin it!! ;)

And, judging by the slobber sessions they have when she gets in the car, I highly doubt they are related. And if they are, him not coming to to the door is the least of her problems... Hahaha