Wednesday, February 29, 2012

The Waiting Game

Well here we are, 39 weeks pregnant and feeling it.  My blood pressure has stabilized, (still high but not getting any higher) and all the other tests look great.  For a few days last week my doc was talking about inducing me this past Monday or Thursday, but now that everything looks good again, Baby Dinosaur is officially scheduled to launch his world tour on Monday, March 5th 2012.  Can't wait!
Poor Big Dinosaur, with all the back and forth with induction scheduling, he is just ready to have him here already.  He says, "It's like watching previews for a really great movie for 9 months then never getting to see it."  Oh darling, you will be front and center for the premier in no time at all.

I personally have mixed feelings about being induced.  On one hand, I want Baby Dinosaur to stay in as long as he wants to and come out when he's good and ready.  On the other hand it's sort of nice to be able to make plans around his Birthday.  Yet on the other hand (I have 4 you know, I can say that), knowing when I'm going to have a baby is scary as shit.  It's like someone saying, "Hey, come to the hospital on Monday and we're going to break both your legs then give you a magical gift!" and I just have to be like, "Ok, great!" (Side note- When I told my Step-Mom how I felt she said, "Psh,  you'll WISH they were just going to break both your legs!"  Thanks Mo! ;)
I wish I would have found THIS sooner....
Either way, we are ready for Baby.  Room is set up, car seat is installed, bottles are washed and diapers are stacked.  Big Dinosaur and I have been running around getting things all prefect.  I got my car detailed and he shaved his beard; we washed Bianca and brushed her teeth; I've made the entire house smell like sunshine and glitter. We are putting on a big front so the baby thinks we are capable adults.  At least...for awhile...

So as promised, here are some pics of the finished nursery.  Let me know what you think!

Notice the dangling yarn balls above the changing table?  This is my idea to distract Baby Dinosaur so he won't shit on me.  I'll let you know how it works.  Also, the deck chair will be replaced with an actual rocking chair at some point...

Baby has his own bathroom access, just in case he wants to get up and take care of business in the middle of the night.

His bed is nicer than mine and Big Dinosaur's....

 Awesome Dino Bedding.

Bianca wanted to be in the pictures tooo!!! Spoiled Rotten Dog.

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

The Bianca Debate

For those of you who don't know, Bianca is our precious puppy that we adopted last year.  She is a 3 year old boxer/pitt mix and is the apple of our eye.  As much as Big Dinosaur and I love her, we argue about her frequently.  Well, not argue...more like we have a heated debate going and I'd like to get all of your opinions so that all of the internets will know I'm right and Big Dinosaur is wrong.  Again.

Here's the issue- One day about 2 months ago, I casually mentioned that I thought Bianca closely resembled a polar bear.  Thing is, I wasn't even talking to Big Dinosaur when I said it, I was talking to Bianca and he overheard.

Me to Bianca: You're just a big 'ol polar bear, arn't you?!?! Yes you are! Yes you are! (Don't give me shit, you know you talk to your animals like that too.)

Joe: Did you just call her a polar bear??

Me: Yeah....Doesn't she look like one?

Joe: Ha!  Uhh yeah, I guess if you remove the brown spots..and add about 400 pounds and a massive amount of fur...oh and of course the fact that SHE'S A DOG!!   You're crazy.

Me: It's not that far of a stretch.  To Bianca: Daddy doesn't have an imagination.

Joe: What?

Me: Nothing...

I know you can't tell, but I actually photoshopped this.

So Big Dinosaur proceeds to relay this story to all of our friends over the next few weeks and everyone gets a good giggle at my expense.  Seems no one agrees that our beautiful puppy resembles a massive polar beast.  But then, last week, out of the blue this happens:

Joe:  Bianca looks like an Ewok.

Me: Whhhaaaa??!?!  You mean the FICTIONAL characters from Star Wars? The ones that don't even exist?!?!  You think she looks like an Ewok. Seriously?!!?  More than a polor bear...and ACTUAL animal!

Joe: Ok, ok I walked into that one.

Me: Oh yeah, you did.  I don't even remember seeing any WHITE Ewoks.  I'm pretty sure they don't come in white.  How could you hide in the forest if you were a white Ewok?  You couldn't.  Oh yeah, and not to mention the fact that THEY DON'T EXITS!!!

Not even close to believable.

So the debate began.  I say polar bear, Big Dinosaur says Ewok.  Kind people of the internets, I would like to leave it up to you.  What do you think?

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Bed Rest, Smed Rest.

So, turns out I SUCK at being on "bed rest."  There is just so much to do and I only have 2 weeks to do it!  Baby Dinosaur will be here before we know it and the nursery doesn't even have pictures on the wall!  He is going to get here and be like, "Seriously, mom?  You couldn't even hang a damn picture?!"  And to that I'll say, "You're lucky you have a crib and won't be sleeping in the laundry basket!" which was my original plan but it seems having your infant sleep in a laundry basket is frowned upon.

Seriously though, we were blessed with a huge family and group of friends who have given us enough baby supplies to last thought the first 10 years or so.  Thank you all :) Here is one of my favorites.

Thanks Mandy-Loo!!!

I wish I could sit here and tell you all the horror stories about being pregnant because it would be hilarious, but it turns out...I was MADE for this shit.  I've had the easiest, non-complicated preganancy in the history of the world and I would like to pubicly give credit to my Amazonian Woman ancestors and my mom for the kick ass breeding.

I've had no sickness, morning or other, no crazy hormone rages. I've only gained 40 lbs, and yeah, that's on the high side but I'm pretty sure Baby Dinosaur will come out weighing 20 lbs, so there's half right there!

I have been a little emotional, an OnStar commercial on the radio made me bawl like a baby the other day, and I start crying at random points in everyday conversations which tends to freak people out a bit.  But so far the only medical issue I've had is this stupid blood pressure thing.  It keeps being high and I keep telling it to chill the fuck out, but it keeps not listening so my doctor put me on "bed rest."  Which is okay because I just get to extend my maternity leave to 2.5 months instead of 2.

One thing I wasn't prepared for, the BOOBS.  My simple little Bs inflated to Ds overnight and from what I hear, they are going to get even bigger!  Then smaller...and flatter....and then they will miraculously get plasticier.  Yeah, just made that word up.  Plasticier, definition: Containing more plastic than previously thought possible.

So I'm off, I must reorganize the nursery..again.  Maybe once I have it all set up I will post pics. And then once I reorganize it again, I will post pics of that too.  For now, here is a sneak preview.

Why yes, the theme IS Dinosaurs.  How did you guess?!

Thursday, February 9, 2012


HI INTERNET!!!  I'm back!  We decided to try to save money so we cut out our cable and internet for the past 6 months.  And guess what? We didn't spend money on the cable/internet for 6 months.  You know what we did spend it on?  Because I sure as hell don't.  I know I don't have a pile of saved money laying around, that's for sure.

So I decided that since we were spending the money anyway, we might as well get cable/internet back, and I didn't have to twist Big Dinosaur's arm too far before he caved.  After all, it's pretty hard to deny a huge ass pregnant lady anything she wants.

Bianca and I, about a month ago.  Huge. Ass. Pregnant.

Speaking of huge ass pregnant ladies....I'm a HUGE ASS PREGNANT LADY!!  I am currently 36 weeks with our son and holy shit, y'all, have I got some fun stories to tell!  There is a lot they don't tell you about being pregnant.  I think other moms don't want to scare younger women out of having kids so they keep all this shit secret, then when you experience all these fun side effects their all, "Oh yeah, that's normal."  Thanks.  Could have told me about "lightning crotch."  Thanks.

But for now, I just wanted to let you all know I'm BACK and I'll be keeping up more frequently.